Thank god for the beautiful day...

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[January 2010]

[February 2010]

Thank god for Monday, February 8, 2010

After School~ 0 Messages

someone get me this dress. > <

Let's plan an outing with four of us.. oh i know~

Sleepover!!! I mean.. the last sleepover,

Yeng was missing... yeah... XD

Sometimes I think...

I'm missing out a lot on a lot of people.

Ever since school ended...

I feel like, my social life with School people

has also ended in a way. I'm not socially inclined

with most of the school people... of course

there will be exceptions, like you guys and many many more.

But honestly, i feel like.. I don't know what goes on in

you guys life anymore. Need to do lots of catching up

on one another. Missing out on a lot,

i like people from YES, but people from YES

are still not all of you guys...

I wanna paint! I wanna paint! I've got

a whole visual in my head...

but i can't get it out on the art block.

I wanna paint my whole life out!

hee......... *evil smile*

SO CUTE!!! XD i love stickmans for some reason. lols!!

Oh by the way....

KRIS ALLEN WAS AWESOME LIVE!!

HE SOUNDS SO SO SO SO GOOD. and of course.. cute. XD

The beautiful day...
11:52 PM

Thank god for Sunday, February 7, 2010

0 Messages

there are only two ways to live your life:

One is as though nothing is a miracle.

The other is as if everything is.

The beautiful day...
7:01 PM

0 Messages

KYAA!! the blog's changing again~ heehee thanks to cher!! she's good! yupyup~

i like the daisy and there's a drop of water. looks like it's crying T^T

Cher, stay strong!! you have us. whenever you're not in the mood just use that mug ok??

drink milo and everything will be fine ^~^ but 1 condition. must use that mug XD

i'm sure everyone have different ways of shoo-ing the sad feeling emo etc away.

cher don't be extreme hard on yourself. let loose a bit.

learn about freedom a bit. obviously there's no total freedom in this sucky world but

slowly you will see things that our eyes cannot see. there's a lot of things

we haven't see. so stay strong go with the flow smile at your bad memories

and kiss it's ass goodbye!! hell yeah!!

now you may think you are useless and sucky but the truth is

YOU ARE NOT!!

hmm. . .thinking positively won't make thing turn out negatively

maybe something went wrong somewhere. take a deep breath clear your mind

and start looking it at a different angle and an open mind ^~^

if you always think about everything negatively there'll be black auras coming form you XD

think again cher are you sure not much good thing has happened to you??

maybe you're very much pressured. but learn to make something hard soft

why do you think the class is cursed by you? there's no such thing ok!!

i can feel your black aura XD

don't worry when you emo you have me to emo with you XD emo peoples!!

cher, wanna about fine arts? actually it is something very good.

it's about finding yourself. you may go trough difficulties during that time

but later you will start to see a lot. learn a lot. and feel a lot.

you will see this world isn't so bad after all. everything depends on how you look at it.

if you emo all the way CONFIRM nothing good will happen and all the

bad things will just follow you. no matter how many times you fall down,

don't sit there and cry about it or wait for people to help you up.

try to help yourself up first. and you got us helping you. we will always be here.

I'll post more. i can't think of what else to nag you XD wakakakakakakaa

*****************************************************************************
Zanne thanks for the picture. yeah true very true.

i'm not alone. i have my cupcakes with me ^~^

-yeng-

The beautiful day...
5:32 AM

Thank god for Tuesday, February 2, 2010

I was just thinking 0 Messages

Since i was young....till now....i think not much good thing has happened to me....

i'm realistic....yeah....i am....but not because i'm that type...

it's just that the reality shapes me into that way......

so that i will not feel so sad or whatsoever ......

Usually when i enter a class.....

it was like the class have been "cursed" by me

not good , etc....

then when i get out for the class...

it would be so much better.....

even for societies and clubs that i've joined....

i felt that i just don't know why whatever thing i join....in the end , the whole thing will be a disaster....

i felt that i can't obtain real and blissful happiness....

i felt that everything that could have / already mine will be taken by someone else one day...

it happened to me several times...

and i just think why in the world my life would be so .................

i just don't know what to say anymore.....

the guys i liked , i nearly get them...

then someone would just ...

i'm just afraid that now....

that would be the same thing happening again....

i might just be destined to lead a life to give someone else lessons and myself ...

live in solitary and just hope for what good things have been installed for me.....

everything fails when i'm in a " something "....

but when i'm not in the " something " ( groups , class ., etc )

it will have loads of success....

i wished that i'm prettier...

i wished that i have a better body...

i wished i have shaper facial features...

i wished that i'm smarter...

i wished that i'm more talented...

i wished that i'm more sporty....

i wished that i'm more girly.....

i wished that i can cook better....

i wished i have more confidence in myself.....

i wished i have a healthier mind....

i wished my chin would not be the way they are.....

i wished that i'm not so ugly.....

i wished that i'm cooler....

i wished that i'm cuter....

i wished that i'm more fun loving....

i wished i can be more spontaneous.....

i wished i won't be hurt again.......

i wished that people would just notice me.....

guess that i will always be the one behind the scene in whatever i do.......

guess that i will forever wishing to get something i want but will never have that chance....

why i always lose something when i'm THIS near getting something......

at least i will not tend to have jealousy.....

i just hated myself at times.....

i won't get anything i wish...

i will not...

i just don't knw what to say anymore.....

i'm just destined to see people living happily having to accomplished something....

and me....

crying and thinking why i always lose something when i'm so happy and blissful .....

i suck @ playing the piano

i suck @ being pretty

i suck @ being more loving

i suck @ showing my care towards people

i just plain suck @ everything i do...

i don't want to be the one at the side watching __ getting ___ by someone else...

this is a little selfish...

but i'm just a girl.....

i'm no longer a positive thinker because when you think positively and something turns out negatively , you will be so heartbroken....

but at least when you think negatively when something turns out negative.....you won't feel so hurtful....

but when you think negatively when something turns out positive, the happiness will be so so much =D

i should just keep it that way

The beautiful day...
12:18 AM

Thank god for Wednesday, January 27, 2010

0 Messages

Hey Guys !!

at last i'm back to blogging ...here =D lols

The beautiful day...
8:50 PM

0 Messages

Hey Guys !!

at last i'm back to blogging ...here =D lols

The beautiful day...
8:50 PM

Thank god for Sunday, January 24, 2010

0 Messages

Suddenly. . .it feels like many years had passed.

Many things changed. . .

Suddenly it seems like we are so far apart. . .

Further than strangers. . .

Suddenly. . .

Even the colour pink reminds me about a lot of things

cotton candy

sweet memories

of me and you

i can remember the way you smile at me when we went out for the first time

i can remember the look on your face when i surprisingly show up

i can remember the look on you face when you are shy

i can remember the way you act like a kid

i can remember the things you said

i can remember the way you wipe my sweats

i can remember the way you let me hug you when the train moves

i can remember how you eat prawns

i can remember the way you say "you're a girl, should bring tissue"

then you will give me a packet of tissue when i ran out of tissue

i use those tissue very careful and not to waste it

i can remember the way you tell me about the plans you have in you mind

whenever you talk about those plans, your eyes sparkles

you will give me this special feeling

i really wished whatever you and i planed will work out

but. . .

none of them happened

i can remember the way you laugh

it gives me a really warm feeling when i see you laugh

sometimes my heart will beat sooooo fast when i see you

especially when you dress up and styled your hair

seeing you all dressed up and your hair nicely styled, i just wanna mess it ><

i just want to mess your hair and see you angry that i mess your hair ^^

it's cute to see you angry that i mess your hair ^^

it's cute when you are shy

it's cute when you don't know certain things and i will explain to you

it's cute to see you that way, like a cute little boy ^^

it's cute to see lean on me when you are sad or having migraine

i feel very happy to be able to let you lean on me

i am happy that you are true to me. you did not hide your tears

to see your tears is something to me

they make me wanna protect you even more

they make me want to not leave you side and to walk with you

Every time when i'm waiting for you to arrive, i am nervous

When you arrived i got even more nervous

But after you came to hold my hands, i felt safe

i felt that you won't let go of me

that you will continue to hold my hand, tightly

your palm is warm and big ^^ holding my small hands

when i hug you, all my worries and those grey clouds above my head

seems to fade away quickly

i feel so secure and so warm to be in your arms

i feel very 'xing fu'

just a pat on my head i feel that you will take good care of me

When you're by my side even the worse thing that happen to me seem to be a tiny problem

but now. . . .

i don't feel all that anymore

even when i am sitting right beside you

i feel so far apart from you

so so far that i cannot reach you

the way you turn your back on me. . .

it really hurts

so lonely. . .

so empty. . .

so cold. . .

you are now so so far from me. . .

you are no longer by my side

you no longer protect me from all the storms

you no longer lean on me

you no longer give me warmth

you no longer keep me with you

i cannot feel your presence anymore

i cannot feel your warmth anymore

i cannot feel my heart anymore

i cannot smile anymore

i don' know how to cry anymore

everything seems so dull

every chocolate taste bitter

i can no longer make myself happy

i can no longer lie to myself

but now. . . i realise i can only pray for you

there's nothing else i can do for you

every night i pray that you are safe, you are healthy,

you are guided to the correct path,

you know what you want,

somehow i know i still can find me somewhere in your heart

somehow i still wanna stay by your side even if you left me

i still wanna be the one supporting you

protecting you

giving you a push

The beautiful day...
9:36 AM